By the laws of celebrity physics, any single famous person who is photographed talking to a second, single, famous person is either (a) dating them or (b) interested in dating them.
And so it came to pass that celebrity smut hounds enjoyed a lengthy game of photo assumption after Shakira and Tom Cruise were pictured chatting at the Formula One Miami Grand Prix.
They were together - but not alone - at the starting grid and in a private hospitality suite. Ooh la la! How much chatting one can do in the starting grid on a Formula One race track is up for debate. All bets are off as regards the hospitality suite.
Sources (those leaky vessels journalists depend on) have offered contradictory briefings. He’s keen! She’s not! He’s small! She’s smaller!
Page Six has it from a source that there was definite “chemistry” between the pair and Tom is “extremely interested in pursuing” Shakira. Please, who wouldn’t, she’s Shakira, anyone would want her as their wing woman.
“Shakira needs a soft pillow to fall on, and that could be Tom,” Page Six’s source said, adding that the Top Gun was “a nice-looking guy and he is talented.” Tom’s mum, is that you?
The source continued: “And she isn’t taller than him.” Definitely Tom’s mum. Who else is going to draw everyone’s attention to that thing you’re sensitive about? For the record Tom is five feet seven inches tall (although whether that’s in sock soles or stacked heels is anyone’s guess) and Shakira is five feet two inches.
Page Six says Tom sent Shakira flowers after their race track encounter.
Read more: Hungry boars target Shakira
Shakira’s people moved to shut things down fast. They want you and Debbie from accounts to stop playing photo assumption and get back to work. Ok, you can have 60 seconds to check and discuss Holly Willoughby’s outfit of the day but then it’s back to work.
US Weekly spoke to a source from Shakira’s camp who delivered the ‘it’s not you, it’s me’ line on Shakira’s behalf.
“Shakira had a great time hanging out with Tom at F1 but she has no interest in dating him.” The unspoken final clause in that sentence was “...or joining the church of Scientology”.
The source/emailed statement continued: “He was really nice and she enjoyed his company, but she isn’t focused on dating him or anybody else at the moment.
“She has a lot on her plate and is focused on her kids and career for now.”
When Tom was with Katie Holmes their portmanteau was TomKat and the very real concern that Tom and Shakira would become known as TomShak is reason enough for them not to enter into a relationship.
The pair were photographed at the Grand Prix on a Sunday and on the Wednesday Shakira was pictured climbing aboard a yacht with Lewis Hamilton and a large group of others so if the laws of celebrity physics are correct that means Shakira and Lewis are dating, doesn’t it?
Brad Pitt racing at Silverstone
Staying with Formula One news, Brad Pitt is going to be filming scenes for his new movie at Silverstone this summer.
Brad, who presumably has a driving licence but someone from the insurance company might want to check, will be behind the wheel of an adapted Formula Two car at the Formula One British Grand Prix.
Apparently he will be on the race track between practice sessions.
Lewis Hamilton is producing the film about a racing driver who comes out of retirement to take on a rookie and it’s being directed by the man responsible for Top Gun: Maverick.
Formula One fans, you’re up to date.
Jared Leto's Met Gala photo album
Jared Leto, method actor extraordinaire, has shared some pictures from the Met Gala for which he chose to honour deceased fashion designer Karl Lagerfeld by turning up dressed as his cat, Choupette.
It was a creepy costume and Jared wore it well. Please enjoy this selection of ‘Choupette’ snaps.
